New found motivation!!

I am watching an old episode of the USA Biggest Loser on Foxtel, it's actually the same season that they put on here in OZ and then it just disappeared and then it was put on a different day several times and then of course I lost track of it and never saw the end of it. Anyway there is one contestant in particular named Ali who was in the pink team with her mum, they were both eliminated in week 4, but when the eliminated contestants had the chance to come back Ali managed to get a spot back into the house. I have just finished watching last nights episode which is week 15 of the show and the final 4 contestants have been sent home to continue on until the finale. Her starting weight was 234 pounds (106 kg) and her current weight is 135 pounds (61kg) giving her a total loss of 99 pounds (44 kg). She has lost the most weight of any female ever in the BL campus and has the highest percentage of weight loss of the season out of everybody - including the men.

Because it was the last episode before the finale there was a huge re-cap over the last 15 weeks and I found that the things Ali was saying were very inspiring, they were real, things that I could really relate to. I am sure they are things that anyone on a weight loss journey can relate to :

Week 1 - "I want to wear sleeveless shirts and not worry about anything jiggling"
"No more excuses"

Week 3 - "I don't want to be unhappy anymore, I don't want to be in a body that makes me unhappy. It's more than just eating, it's more than just losing weight".

There are parts when she is watching her audition video with Jillian and the comments she makes - " want it more than I want anything right now - All the way" That's me at the moment, I want it, I want to lose the weight, I want to wear sleeveless shirts. Back to Ali, she was saying to Jillian how embarrassed she was, how she wanted to cry - that is exactly how I feel most of the time. Ali also says (looking back) that she "forgot" how fat she was - I can not wait to forget how fat I am, I would love to be saying was.

In week 4 when Ali and her mum were eliminated she said "I am going to be the biggest loser". Even though Ali said that in week 4, here in week 15 she says "when I said it, I believed it and I have never stopped thinking that I will be the biggest loser".

Jillian then took Ali to meet someone, it was a life size cut out of herself when she first arrived at the BL campus, this is what she said (after screaming in disgust) :

"I think that everybody who has had weight issues knows that it's not about the pounds that are on your body, it's about why do you hold onto the weight? What puts the weight on you? Where did you give up on yourself? Where did I give up on myself?"

"I love me and I think that's the difference and I think that the only way I can respect me is by taking care of myself".

"I wasn't pround of where I had gotten in my life but it didn't mean that I couldn't be proud of who I was".

"I am living again, I'm excited to get up and to go for it all".

When Ali was talking about her BL experience on her way home she said :

"It took a lot of courage for me to admit that I had lost control of my life, that I had given up on having dreams and I had given up on me and I wanted to take that control back. This experience has reminded me of who I was, why not me? Why don't I deserve to have everything I've always wanted?"

"I lost 99 pounds, I DID IT, I created a body I could be proud of. I dealt with lots of issues mentally, spiritually and emotionally so that I don't ever get back there again so I don't ever try to hide myself again".

I have started my journey a little heavier (9kg) than Ali, but the weight she is now is where I want to be (60kg). She also reminds me of several people from WW and many of the blogs I follow, but to actually see her transformation is incredible. Her arms are sensational, they look a little similar to Michelle Bridges and that is an achievement in itself.

I know this is a big rambling blog today, but I just find this young woman so amazing, her strength and courage, her determination is inspiring, but most of all, she has taught me how important it is for me to believe in myself, that I NEED to believe in myself.