Tracking, Tracking and........Tracking!!

Why is tracking so hard for me???

It is the hardest part of my weight loss journey. I have never really understood why tracking is so hard for me when it really is as easy as writing a list.

I like writing lists - I write them all the time for shopping or reminding me of things that I need to do. If I don't write things down and make lists I forget what needs doing or buying from the supermarket. So WHY, when it comes to tracking is it so hard for me? Why do I find it so difficult to list my foods and just WRITE them down?

Luckily for me Bitch Cakes has written a wonderful post on this exact same topic - Tracking. She has made some wonderful realisations of her own about her tracking and has just spoken about tracking in general. As usual it has really helped me to see where I am going wrong with my tracking and forced myself to look at my reasons and ask myself the same questions.

Time for some Q & A :

• Why don't I track?

Not sure if it pure laziness or a form of denial, maybe a combination of both. I don't mind tracking the "good" foods, but I don't want to see the "bad" stuff - the stuff I've eaten out of frustration that I know I shouldn't have eaten and even at the time of consumption, I knew I shouldn't be eating it - what is wrong with me? Oooops, wrong spot, this should be another question for myself.

• Does it help me if I don't track?

No! It doesn't help me achieve my goals if I don't track.

• Do I lose (weight) when I track?

Yes! I do lose weight when I track. I need to track to lose the weight as I only tend to track the "good" foods, the foods that I should be eating. I don't like tracking the foods filled with sugar and other rubbish - denial.

• Why when I go over my points/calories do I just stop tracking?

It's denial - pure and simple! I hate having to look at the foods that have taken me over my daily allowances so I just don't write it down and I stop tracking altogether for the day.

• Why don't I FORCE myself to be accountable for the "wrong" things I have eaten?

I think it's just a way of denying that I ate that specific food and I don't want to have to look at it written on my list. The thing is though, I know that just because it's not written down for me to see it that doesn't mean that it doesn't have calories.

• What is wrong with me?

Denial is what is wrong with me. When I read back through my (rather pathetic) Q & A's to myself, there is one thing that pops up in each one - Denial. I simply don't like being accountable to all the bad food choices I make. As Bitch Cakes says (in short) - whatever "I choose to ingest are my choices, the least I can do is be accountable for them."

I know that for me to really change my life successfully in the ways that I want to, I need to be able to track every single thing that I eat. It needs to be automatic and needs to be done. I know that once I reach goal I will still have to continue to track what I eat.

If I got this big once but just eating whatever I wanted whenever I wanted and NOT being accountable for it, then it can just as easily happen again. This is for life, it's a life time change.